DIY Brunch Pitchers, Little Havana Style

Ah, the first warm weekend of March. The tease of an upcoming Spring. Does anything make you want to start drinking early, more than that first Sunday when temperatures reach the 60s? Goodbye chores, hello impromptu Sunday Funday.

A trip to Target netted us the all-inclusive badminton set (netted us, get it?), and we found the Dollar Tree stocks plastic 2-liter pitchers. With friends on the way over, and the girlfriend cooking up some serious breakfast burritos (with shredded chicken AND dried chorizo, mind you), it was time for me to throw together enough Bloody Mary & mimosa action to get everyone good and toasted. Only then would be ready to step out back and challenge each other for the best shuttlecock joke.

Of course, the bottomless pitchers of Bloody Marys & mimosas at Little Havana brunches are a big draw - and rightfully so. $13.95 for a underwhelmingly sized plate of breakfast you'll have to wait forever to arrive isn't so bad, when you know A) it'll be tasty and more importantly B) the price includes drink-til-the-cows-come-home goodness. But sometimes we don't have the money, drive, or stomach to fight our way through the scores of yuppies in the popular Federal Hill establishment. Here's your DIY solution:

First off, make a bunch of ice. We're talking at least 6 trays' worth. Obtain 4 2-liter pitchers. It'll help if measurements are listed along the pitcher's side.
Also purchase and chill the following:
3 bottles of champagne/sparkling wine, 750mL - cheap is good, I like Andre Spumante ($5.99 ea)
750mL bottle of vodka - feel free to roll with rail. My buddy brought over Kamchatka, which did the job.
3 bottles of Mr. & Mrs. T Bloody Mary mix, 33.8 fl. oz. - I prefer the Bold & Spicy variety ($3.99 ea). Tip: if you choose a different brand, don't go with Major Peters. Funny name yes, but horrible taste.
2 1/2 gallons of orange juice - again, go cheap, just make sure to get pulpless (approx $1.99 ea)
Hopefully you already have pepper, Old Bay, and some form of Worcestershire sauce (I use Lea & Perrins). If not, grab 'em. If you're the type who likes a celery garnish, slice some up too.

The mimosas are simple as can be. Toss one liter of champagne and one liter of orange juice in each of the first two pitchers. You should have enough left over for a bonus pint or so.

The Bloody Marys are a little more of a science. Exact proportions will vary by taste. As for me, I like 'em spicy. Each of my pitchers came to 1 1/4 liters Bloody Mary mix, about 2/3 liter vodka, a teaspoon of Worcestershire, a sprinkle of pepper, and at least a teaspoon of Old Bay. These suckers had kick. I'd love to be more specific with my proportions, but I was winging it. There were a few mimosas under my belt by that point, as well.

Here's something you can do to ensure that your brunch booze will stay tastier than that of Little Havana: keep all that ice separate. While they put it directly in the pitchers, you should be scooping it out into your guests' glasses as needed. This keeps your pitchers from getting watered down and severely less delicious.

4 pitchers should take care of a good crowd (say 6-8), assuming that everyone doesn't go for your mimosas and disregard their tomato-based brunch brother-in-arms. Cheers.